Upping sticks

I’ve been floating on hormones. Without the rollercoaster of each month to worry about, I’ve been able to shift into a higher gear and concentrate on what it is I want in the long term before my life get subsumed by short term goals. It’s a kind of madness, like bi-polar, of which I’m convinced my father (currently ditching his third wife and kids to vacay with a 29 year old in Asia) suffers. Luckily I don’t have his money, so there’s only so much damage I can do.

I can, however, ruin my own children’s lives with one bad decision and the ones I’m taking right now are life changing.

One climbing trip to Harrison’s Rock in Tonbridge Wells got me looking at house prices. A day on Rightmove focused my mind. On the second viewing we found what we were looking for: clean lines, modern, spacious, luscious lawn but not too much work, a village school and good grammars. After the shambles of Jonah’s parents’ evening, I was sold.

The commute may yet kill us. Traffic is notorious and between us it will add ten grand to our annual costs. I can’t even think about that yet since I have maternity leave to get through, which I now see as an opportunity to sort things out, get the kids settled, and learn live with my decisions, or regrets, such as they may be. In other words, the house we’ve lived in for 5 years – the house we’ve only just really got the way we want – is on the market.

Jonah’s not super happy about it- as much as he’s not happy about anything. Change is traumatic at the best of times, and though he loved the house, with its white walls, glass stairs, balcony, cubby holes, garden room (gym!) and room for a tree house (oh and a wine cellar but that’s mainly for us!), it’s not (yet!) home.

The wrench to a new school means he’s bricking it at having to do it all over again after moving to secondary only last year. But this time, the choice is Hobson’s – an outstanding academy just up the road or one of the best grammar schools in the country where he may find other boys like himself, for all that means leaving behind the few he’s made where he is.

Ava is, as usual, nonplussed. With only ever one friend at a time she has less to leave behind, but right about now, my friend count is looking pretty thin too. But what’s the point of a luscious lawn if you can’t have playmates round to enjoy it?

I’m hoping that being a new mum, for all its challenges, will help me remedy that. After all the best time to start over is when others are finding themselves in the brave new world of parenthood. And if we don’t move now, we’ll probably never do it. I just hope, what with the housing market looking less steady than it has in years, we can get everything sewn up before we’ve got a little one to worry about. But for once, I feel as though we’re in a good position- happy enough where we are, that we can actually relax about this life changing decision and let fate run its course. Like so much in life, we can but wait and see what happens.